A521.4.3.RB_FogartyShawn

     The nonverbal elements of communication make up more than half of what is expressed. All too often people convey separate or different messages that what they are trying to say. This occurs through body language, metamessages, and trying to influence hidden agendas. The most significant aspect of communication is to ensure you truly say and show that you are congruent in your verbal and nonverbal expressions.
      Body language is significant as you can sometimes judge a person even before they speak. If they are in a defensive posture it may be best to hold off asking them something until you can crack their shell. I often rely on my outgoing personality to open or soften people up before I ask or request something from them. By using appropriate eye contact, facial expressions and posture you can transfer or take control of the conversation.
     The next aspects to successful communications are through the analysis of paralanguage and metamessages. This is where you apply or diagnosis the tools used in verbal communications such as pitch, resonance, articulation, tempo, volume. If someone is talking too fast for you to comprehend they may be disinterested in actually talking to you. You can use the articulation of their words to aid in determining their credibility of a given subject. Lastly, the volume and resonance of their voice will help aid you in determining the congruent nature about what they are speaking. In regards to metamessages, this breaks down what they are saying into the basic information being conveyed and the attitude and feelings about what was conveyed.    
     Lastly, all communications have an agenda, but when the speaker is trying to apply an underlying message they are guilty of communication a hidden agenda. This is the element I most frequently encounter within my organization. In a recent conversation I found the other person’s body language not matching up to what they were verbally communicating. I didn’t feel that they were congruent in nature and that led me to believed there was a hidden agenda. A co-worker was asking me if I’d swap shifts with him next week and expressed how I would be “trading up.” I left the conversation with “I’ll get back to you” and discussed the nature of his requests with another colleague. I later returned to the individual and picked up the conversation where we left off. He again asked me if I’d consider swapping shifts with him next week but this time I asked him if he was going to tell me about the increased workload and requirements for his shift. I was able to sniff out his hidden agenda but the incongruent nature of his body language.